Snake: This is Snake. Colonel, can you hear me?

Campbell: Barely. What's the situation Snake?

Snake: Looks like I can't get out of here.

Campbell: Just as I expected.

Snake: You mean you knew I was gonna get stuck here?

Campbell: You have to take the elevator to the surface.

Snake: The e...e-elev-vator?

Campbell: Snake, get the fuck over it. It's just an elevator, they go up and down and up and...

Snake: *dizzy* Oh God...oh god no...*nervous and sweaty*

Campbell: If you need to, contact me by Codec and all that shit.

Snake:*still sweaty and shit* Oh God....oh god no...

Campbell: Colonel, depart! *hangs up*

Snake: WAIT! Oh fuck...

*snake waits for the elevator in fear*

*calls Colonel*

Snake: It's not coming down...

Campbell: Already taken care of. I ordered one from eBay. They should be setting it up by now. You go hide behind that for truck for now.

Snake: How did you know there was...

Campbell: Nachos, yeah bitch! *hangs up*

Snake: Fucking queer.

*the elevator finally arrives and Snake is hiding behind the for truck he didn't know about until Colonel told him*

Snake: Oh shit, oh shit...*nervous*

*guard pops out*

Snake: Oh no...*goes crazy* The mediciiiiine!!

*guard notices*

Guard: Freeze!!

Snake: *draws a ninja blade* Hurt me adequately!

Guard: *pulls out a spoon* No problem.

*another guard approaches and CQCs the guard to death. He pulls of his mask, and is revealed to be....Big Boss*

Snake: Dad! You're...alive?! I knew that fuckin aerosol was wasted.

BB: This mission is just staged. *tells the entire story to come* I know, they could have done a lot better. Personally, I'd put myself instead of your brother. But I'm supposed to be dead and shit, so..

Snake: So their demands can't be met?

BB: Obviously...

Snake: Then fuck this shit. I'm going home.

BB: Not yet, there's still one thing you need to do.

Snake: That would be? Kill you?

BB: Fuck no. Campbell didn't pay for that elevator, I did.

Snake: So?

BB: You have to ride it at least once, or it'll be wasted.

Snake: Heh, like I care.

BB: Fine, I'll put it on your tab. $600 000.

Snake: Hey hey hey..I'm gonna take a ride. Need some fresh air anyways.

BB: You're such a pussy, my inferior one.

Snake: Inferior? But you said....

BB: I didn't say anything. Now ride the elly, go go go

*snake rides the elevator up towards a very predictable story*

Snake: *calls colonel* This is Snake. I'm in front of the disposal facility.

Campbell: That took a while...

Some things are pretty laughable, kinda liked it.

Inspired by MGS Awesome?

why yes it is.

glad you liked it, didn't expect anyone to comment.

I'd love to see it Metal Gear Awesome style, with the voice acting and all!

"WHAT THE FUUUUCK?! NO ONE TOLD ME THERE WAS A GUARD THERE?!"

that truly would be cool, but i don't know how to make cartoons. maybe i'll make a shitty parody with cool voice acting.