Impact me

People watch...

Here I am on Saturday in the food court people watching
whom do I see around me. No one. Well no one who spikes my interest so far.

Usually I sit in the corner in the back area. This place is good if you want no attention. Almost like being alone. Usually has people who are waiting for there wives friends sisters’ brothers or what have you. Looking off lost in thought. But today I stick myself in the middle
I do not with to be viewed but to be the viewer I am after all viewer discretion. Amaryllis advise. It doesn’t make sense. It doesn’t need to.
I am not a writer so don’t bitch to me if I jump form topic to topic. It’s who I am suck it up.

I am eating pizza and drinking coke. How North American of me. Shame.
Well it’s a nice change from McDonalds….the only food besides home cooked I have been eating recently
It is meat thank you for asking. The only kind of pizza! Well for me.
I half wish this place had wifi. At the same time then I would not be talking to you. So I guess it’s good.

Today it seems I have not chosen a good spot. I am disappointed in this sitting in the middle business.

This is how my food court works.
It is a rectangle. You can sit around the sides about as wide as a street. Going both ways but only 1 lane per side even though about too cars on each side could fit, that would be dangerous driving. But there is no driving in the food court anyway.

The middle is a huge hole
With places to cross in the middle and near the end.
You can look down onto the people shopping.
This actually bothers me. It’s about the same height from standing on the rail and jumping, as it was that one time with a friend who nearly died. I get vertigo about rails now. I am not afraid of heights.

The youth… The females. Make me sick. The Asian girls actually have style. It’s the white girls.
All dressed in Hollister with their Hollister men (no boys) or Abercrombie and Fitch.
I have yet to see one of these things eat. I only ever see them with coffee or ice caps or fruit drinks or fruit shakes or yogurt.

Eat pizza bitches!! I will have you know sweat pants with the word Hollister is NOT hot.

So when I am noticed you can guess whom by, the opposite sex. This confuses me.
People say I look like I’m 15 or 12 even sometimes (I’m one day tall 12 year old at 5foot8)
Like just the other day (as in a few weeks ago) I got the God of war psp. You have to be over 17. I was IDed and had no idea so I had to come back the next day. I was pissed. My point is the guy was like your don’t look 17. I was like really. I’m 20.
Every time this happens it reminds me of my cute little friend Shannon who is so so so much shorter then me so she is always mistake for a 12 year old. But me I’m tall so I am all like what the fuck?

Anyway back to what it was I was talking about.
So it confuses me because people say I look like a kid but then I get all these comments for guys. You know the your banging nice ass I’d hit that. Tap that ass…and so on.
Yet don’t I look 12-15 to them as well?
These like older then me but not really old guys …wait sometimes-old guys. Say these things to me? AND other little girls! Gross. Now the little girls proabbly love it.
But you know what they aren’t thinking of that guy is thinking he wants to rip off all my clothing and fuck me so hard. She’s thinking. I must be pretty. I’m getting attention.
Or
Other unmentionable things that the guy is thinking about doing to her. She is thinking he thinks she looks pretty in her nice clothing. That Is really skimpy and flashy but she doesn’t really understand that she isn’t being pretty but like saying imagine fucking this…with her clothing.

This is part of the reason I am not a girly girl. If I was I could have all the attention I wanted and rule the world.

I like my jeans t-shirts crazy clothing and my lack of accessories and lack of makeup hair junk and all that crap. You are not your accessories.

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